If you’re struggling trying to come up with an icebreaker to send a girl you like, you’re not alone. While it doesn’t help your situation, most people have trouble coming up with those early text messages when reaching out to someone they like. It’s something we all go through and something everyone struggles with. That’s why we put together this quick guide on how to text a girl you like.
If you got her number, you’re already partway there. All you need to do now is make her fall for you and think you’re the greatest. Easy huh?
The limitations of text
Texting is natural but it does have its limitations. You have to be very clear about your meaning when you text as you cannot read expressions or convey meaning with a look. Clear communication is essential, especially in the early days when you’re getting to know each other. Misunderstandings are all too easy and can be difficult to salvage.
Appreciate the limitation of text whenever you’re messaging a girl you like. Make sure your meaning is clear and think about how they will read it without being able to see your face or know you that well. If the meaning is clear, hit Send. If it isn’t crystal, rephrase it until it is.
Edit, check, send
Read your text before sending. Then re-read it, edit it if you need to, check it again and only then hit send. Nothing turns a girl off like a spelling mistake or where spellcheck takes over and ruins your message. Avoiding these mistakes early on can be a real bonus.
Then, use these tips for texting that girl you like.
Time it right
We lead busy lives and don’t have the spare time we used to. Timing is everything when making a move as you need her to be receptive and able to reply. Text her when she’s at dinner or out with her friends and she may not be able to reply for hours and nobody wants that!
Evening or into the night is generally a good time to text a girl. If you know she is an early riser then don’t text too late. Otherwise, an evening text could lead to a long conversation when you’re both in bed and that can be fun!
Timing is also about time between replies. If she takes 20 minutes to reply and you reply instantly, that comes across as a little needy. Until she knows you better, keep your cool. A good rule of thumb is to reply after the same kind of time as she does. So if she takes 20 minutes to reply, you take 20 minutes to reply and go from there. You will likely find at as the conversation progresses, that delay will grow shorter and shorter.
Use humor
Apparently we are psychologically predisposed to like people who make us laugh. Avoid this if you’re not naturally funny but if you can be amusing, be amusing. Tell jokes, be self-deprecating, tease and keep things light and humorous. Know your audience though and know when to stop. You want to make her laugh and not take herself or you too seriously but not be put off by dumb one liners or harsh sarcasm.
Be positive
‘Nobody wants to hear about your aches and pains’ is a quote I hear often from my grandfather. That advice is useful here too. Your initial messages should be upbeat and positive and not go on about how bad your day was. You’re building a relationship not venting about your boss or the traffic. Be positive, be upbeat and be someone she really wants to chat to.
Play get to know you games
Most people like games and there is a lot of scope to play them over text. If those games also let you get to know someone at the same time, all the better. The classics include guess the answer, kiss, marry avoid, 20 questions, truth or dare, trivia challenge and would you rather.
Use some of these or all of them over time to engage with her and get to know her at the same time. These games are the perfect opportunity to show your fun side too so it’s a double win if you can get her involved!
Use mirroring
Mirroring is used a lot in business to build relationships. In this context, it means mirroring her text length, emoji use, time of texting, tone of texts and general behavior. If she always texts late at night, do the same. If she texts in short bursts, do the same. If she prefers longer messages, send her longer messages too. If she uses a lot of emojis, or no emoji, do the same. You get the idea.
Mirroring is a subconscious thing that not many people detect but is an excellent way to build a relationship.
Knowing what and how to text a girl you like isn’t easy. If it was, everyone would do it. However it’s essential knowledge now the phone is such a part of our lives and mastering this art of remote seduction could make your life much more interesting!
