Tinder may have shrunk the world a little and made dating more instant and more accepted but making the first move hasn’t gotten any easier. Sure you can do it on an app so they won’t see you blush but you still have to come up with something interesting to say. That’s where we come in. This list of the best Tinder conversation starters will help you get that date off to a great start.
Icebreakers are useful ways to spark a conversation. Even though dating apps are a numbers game, you also have to work much harder to get attention. Apps can be picked up and put down very easily so you need to work exceptionally hard to hook and engage to make them want to keep chatting and say yes to that date.
Here are three of the best Tinder conversation starters around right now.
Read their profile first
Before you even think of starting a conversation, read the profile. We are all guilty of swiping mainly from profile pics but now you’re going to have to investigate. See what they like, what hobbies they have, what interests, whether they say anything witty or offer something you can use as an ‘in’.
One, reading the profile gives you the information you need to select a conversation starter. Two, it will quickly become obvious to the other person that you took the time to read their profile and pay attention. This will quickly elevate you to the top ten percent of Tinder users so you’re already on your way.
Pick common ground
Having read the profile, is there something in an image or the text that you have common ground with? Have you visited the same beach? Like the same team? Wear the same outfit? Both love a particular type of coffee? Traveled to the same countries? Like the same breed of puppy? You get the idea.
If the profile shows travel, there’s your opener. ‘Hey, I visited Thailand too, I loved Bangkok and Patpong was an assault on the senses. Whereabouts did you go?’
While other people will likely comment on the travel aspect, showing knowledge of the place in question automatically places you ahead of anyone who hasn’t been there. Asking a question then opens the door for a reply.
You can do this with any aspect of the profile. ‘Is that your Spinone puppy? I have a Labradoodle called Dave and I bet they would play together for hours. Want to find out?’
A slightly more forward opener but again using something from their profile that most replies wouldn’t. Plus, most dog owners respond positively to other dog owners, especially cute ones.
You don’t have to be completely serious in an icebreaker. Although, fair warning, you should only use humor if you’re any good at it. If being funny doesn’t come naturally you may be better off leaving well alone until the jokes flow and you’re comfortable. Again, use something in the profile and go with that.
Be careful with humor as not everyone has the same sense of humor. If you can come up with something self-deprecating that doesn’t sound lame, that is the best way to go. Then it’s about you being the butt of the joke instead of them.
Make it about you
Sometimes you will come across a Tinder profile with some exceptionally cute pics but very little information in the bio. This happens more often than it should so is something you need to prepare for. Look closely at all the pics and choose one to work with.
For example a pic of the person in a coffee shop with a huge cup of coffee could lead to, ‘Hey, I’m in a coffee shop on 5th right now. First time in LA, I see you like coffee and live here too, did I choose right?’
Yes it’s an obvious opener but you’re both on Tinder so it won’t be unexpected. This skirts the problem of not having anything in a bio to work with but still engages. Asking a question is always good and asking an opinion of a local is even better. It obviously doesn’t have to be a coffee, it could be a vegan burger, sushi or whatever you see in the profile pics or what little bio there is.
It’s never easy making the first move but one of the things dating apps have done is allow us to spread the net wide. If you’re lucky, you will get enough matches to master the icebreaker. Until then, this page should get you started however long you stay on Tinder.
Got any other Tinder conversation starters that work? Suggest them below if you do!